Tag Archives: friends

Unexpected Blessings

The rollercoaster ride called  “My Life” continues.  As much as I didn’t want to have to replace my washer, that was less than four years old, there were some blessings I wouldn’t have expected.

-A friend sent me $150 towards the $444 for the new machine.  Only $294 to go.

-Since I searched for reviews about my new washer on Amazon, they gave me recommendations  for “portable washers”.  And I do mean “portable”.  They only wash a pair of jeans or a couple shirts at a time, but they are able to be used in apartments where there is no hook up for a washer.  You don’t even have to hook them up to the faucet.  You can fill them with a bucket.  So that opened up a whole lot of options that I thought were closed.

-The new washer came Tuesday and it is wonderful.  I’m loving this basic Whirlpool washer with an agitator and knobs instead of electronic buttons.  I like being able to choose my water level and open the lid and see what is going on in there.

So all in all, the washer dying was an unexpected blessing.  I really needed to know that someone/ anyone cared about me and the unexpected gift  helped me feel better about myself and my life.  The knowledge that even if I have to go to an apartment that doesn’t allow a washer there are alternatives in those portable machines.  And my new washer is getting my clothes, towels, and sheets far cleaner that that high efficiency model ever did.  Everything is smelling fresher and looking brighter.

Today I’m grateful for:

1.  I like my new washer better than the high efficiency machine that just died.

2.  Friends.

3.  Writing.

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Great Day

I wasn’t sure how today was going to turn out because I started out this morning with an optical migraine. Optical migraines aren’t painful, but you see nothing but a watery kaleidoscope through your eyes. This makes driving or doing anything that you must see for nearly impossible. Thankfully they only last twenty minutes or so. The other problem when I get one of these is I know it’s because I haven’t been sleeping and resting enough and it’s my body telling me to SLOW DOWN.

Thankfully I didn’t let the optical migraine stop my plans for today because I would have missed a great day. I went to the Greater Lehigh Valley Writer’s Group meeting and then to lunch with my friend and critique partner. I enjoy his company more each time I see him. We sat and talked (well more like I babbled) for over two hours and I didn’t even notice the time going by.

I really wanted to go home after that, but my girlfriend wanted my input on an ereader so I went with her and her husband to Best Buy where she got an android tablet. I think she’ll love it once she learns how to use it.

Today I’m grateful for:

1. I had such a great time with my friend at the writers group and at lunch.

2. Even though I’m behind in NaNoWriMo I’m not giving up. I will catch up tomorrow or next week.

3. I learned a lot about tablets and ereaders tonight.

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CampNanoWrimo

Today is day one of CampNanoWrimo.org. I plan to write 20,000 words of my memoir in these thirty days. So in addition to this blog I’m going to attempt to write at least another 667 words per day towards that goal. Attempt is the optimal word in that sentence. Once again I will not do it if it adds stress to my life.

So what is CampNanoWrimo? It’s similar to NanoWrimo (National Novel Writing Month) in November, but it’s a summer camp themed experience. It’s free to participate and you can sign up to be put in a cabin with other people. This year they’re allowing you to pick your word count goal instead of making it 50,000 words. I like that.

But before I do that today I must get to the grocery store. My refrigerator is bare and I need to get back on track with my healthy eating. I want to get to Valley Farm and Wegmans, but after my shower I’ll have to see how much energy is left.

Yesterday was a long tiring day, but a really nice day. I was in the soundroom at church for two services in the gym (normally there’s only one). Thankfully Mike was there to help me with the first service because they were streaming it live from the sanctuary through the computer and into the gym. (Way too technical for my mind to comprehend!) The service was awesome as always and although I was tired when I was done I felt good that I had served God on such an all important day.

I had a half hour at home before heading out to my girlfriend’s house for Easter dinner. I think there was 12 of us and it was wonderful. Lots of conversation and laughs and great food.

By 4:45 I was tired and my friend had called earlier to see if I would be home so he could stop by for a little and talk. So by 5:30 he was there and we were enjoying decaf coffee while he poured his heart out to me.

By 9:00 I was in bed in pain and ready to pass out. Sleep didn’t come easy, but it did eventually come after reading until I was cross-eyed with an ice-pack under my left shoulder.

Today I’m grateful for:

1. A good day yesterday. Even though I was in pain all day I still managed to get out and enjoy other people’s company.

2. My friend feeling comfortable enough to confide in me.

3. Maybe my dreams will come to pass? I hope.

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Birthday Treats and Surprises

Well my birthday turned out much better than I expected. Until 2:00 pm in the afternoon yesterday I was feeling pretty sorry for myself. Then out of the blue there was a knock on my door. My friend, who I rarely get to spend time with, was there with a smile on his face and a Happy Birthday on his lips. That meant the world to me to know he took the time to drive all the way up to me and spend a couple of hours out of his busy schedule with me.

My friend Bob called to wish me a happy birthday but I missed his call. But it was nice to hear his voice and to know that he remembered me.

My girlfriend, Michelle, from years ago sent me money through pay pal so I could treat myself to a pizza. That was an amazing surprise.

There was a message from Derrick on my blog yesterday wishing me a happy birthday. Our birthdays are the same day and I thought about him from the minute I opened my eyes, but knew I couldn’t contact him because his life is going in a different direction and his fiance was clear that I shouldn’t be friends with him anymore. So I said good-bye in January, shed a lot of tears and thought about him everyday. It was bittersweet to see his comment on my blog. I was glad he thought of me, but I know I can’t really be in his life ever again. So I replied to the comment and I will pick up the remaining pieces of my broken heart and go on from here.

The birthday wishes from my friends on Facebook were amazing too. I tried to personally thank each person that wished me happy birthday. I think I succeeded, but I also posted a thank you in case I missed anyone.

I had a $10 coupon for Outback Steakhouse so my mom offered to buy me lunch there today. So my mom, sister, and I went there today and it was wonderfully delicious. I think the last time I was at Outback was with Derrick two years ago. So it was a really nice treat.

And this morning before I left the house I looked out to see a box on my porch from Edible Arrangements. I knew I hadn’t ordered anything so I was intrigued. I brought the snow-covered box in dried it off and opened it to find a dozen chocolate covered strawberries. I’ve never had them before. I’ve always wanted to try them, but they were always so expensive and not in my budget. Wow are they AMAZING!!!! Thank you Terri! What a wonderful way to celebrate and start a new day!

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Today I’m grateful for:

1. I was so pleasantly surprised for my birthday.

2. I’m still in pain, but today I’m smiling.

3. The snow that fell didn’t amount to anything on the roads.

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Strolling Down Memory Lane

Time passes so quickly. The memories we have were made in a blink of an eye. This morning so many memories are flashing through my mind. Bits and pieces of life that I can’t remember the exact timeline to place them on.

Tim Fitch helping me with my math homework on my parents couch. I can’t remember my exact age, but I know he was my brother’s friend. I had a huge crush on him and I didn’t really need help with math I just wanted some attention. I’m sure he probably knew that, but he would always take a few minutes to humor me. The day I read his obituary in the paper and the choke in my throat and the tears that I shed for a man I hadn’t seen in many years. My only memory the nice young man who took time to make me feel special.

My friend Mary that went into the hospital for a simple operation and never came out. I was stuck in an abusive relationship and was so messed up that I didn’t even know she died until a month later. The years that I beat myself up for not being there for my 34-year-old friend when she needed me the most.

The black cat Liz that snuck in our house and had kittens under our couch. (My father hated cats so we all had to hide this from him.)

The junk cars my family always had growing up. Held together by duct tape and ready to escape to the junkyard.

The way I felt as a child. Like I never quite fit in anywhere. Years later I’ve had people tell me they thought/think I’m a snob. The reality is I’m very shy and insecure and afraid of being rejected and hurt. And I’m still that child that doesn’t feel like I fit in anywhere.

Drinking way to much to cover up my feelings of being less than. The pain of reality when I could no longer drown myself in mind numbing substances. The freedom that God brought into my life. Although I still have remnants of the past I’m dealing with.

My brother “helping” me through the snow by pushing me into a snowbank. The way I idolized him and just wanted him to pay attention to me. The pain and rejection I felt all too often from him throughout my childhood and adult life.

The fuzzy children that have come and gone in my life. “Mr. Pussycat” when I still lived home. The indoor/outdoor battle cat. “Baby” my first kitty when I moved out. She was black and white and her nickname was psycho kitty because she would attack me in the middle of the night. “Sweeti” the pretty petite tortoise-shell girl I rescued from the SPCA. “Buddy” the gray and white kitty that found and claimed me as his own. He touched my heart in ways I never thought possible. “Morriss” my current fuzzy child. Can anyone say CATITUDE!

The inmates that I met over the years when I was involved in prison ministry. Showing me that I am exactly the same as them. It’s just God’s grace that kept me from being in their shoes. The love and acceptance that they showed me and I hope I returned back to them.

So many things I could pick and just write. I hope you don’t mind just a string of brief flashes of memory this morning. I just couldn’t focus on any one thought.

Today I’m thankful for:

1. Memories good and bad have made me who I am. I’m discovering more about myself writing than I have in my whole life.

2. People who take the time to make you feel special.

3. I have a lot to write about. I’ve lived a lot of life in my 45 years.

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Memories

I went to a free Memoir Writing Workshop yesterday afternoon at the Parkland Public Library given by Jerry Waxler. (He’s also a member of the Greater Lehigh Valley Writer’s Group.) It was awesome. I came out of there with a piece of writing that I’ll be able to use in my memoir someday. But as I was driving home memories of me and my friend Bob flooded my mind.

Bob took me to my senior prom. I wasn’t going to go, but he insisted and paid for everything. He was a few years older and could dance so I know I was the envy of many of the girls that day. The memory that floated through my mind yesterday wasn’t as glamorous as all that.

I used to work in the basement of my house for my dad when I was in high school. I made alot more money than all my friends who worked at McDonald’s because it was piece rate and the faster I worked the more money I made. It was a filthy job. I had to clean the grease off and tear the old leather off of what was called lefts, rights, and binders. They were used in the looms to make ribbon. My dad worked at a ribbon factory so he would bring these home and us kids would make money refurbishing them to be reused again.

After cleaning them, I then had to put rubber cement glue on them and attach new leather and trim the excess with a really sharp knife. Now the best part was the glue was HIGHLY FLAMMABLE and was supposed to be used in a well venilated area away from flames. LOL!!! So I’d be in the basement with one tiny little window with a fan blowing out and the coal furnace stoked up fire blazing just behind me.

The best part was when Bob would come over and hang out with me while I was working. We’d be drinking and partying and smoking and sniffing the flammable glue. Many hours of laughter making a filthy job more tolerable. Then one day he found my dad’s swinger magazines. We laughed so hard. Was mine a perfect childhood? Far from it, but it was most definitely memorable. And I have a witness to the craziness that I called home. Thanks Bob for always being there for me. I miss you, but still love you and can’t wait to see you.

Things I’m thankful for today:

1. Long lasting friendships. Distance and time make no difference.

2. The ability to laugh at the memories of years past.

3. I feel well enough to go to church this morning.

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