Hurt

I’m feeling really hurt and down today. I usually go to dinner on Sundays with my mom and sister, but mom called last night to tell me she couldn’t afford to take me. I know that wasn’t my mom talking. My sister is always overly involved and concerned with anything my mom does for me. If my mom tries to sneak me a couple bucks to help me my sister questions her and gets an attitude towards me. So I guess that’s the end of the Sunday dinners. I’m tired of feeling like a piece of garbage.

Thankfully I was tired and in pain so after working in the sound room this morning so I was able to sleep and forget about my life for a little while.

This year has been very painful in many ways. I’m trying to keep my head up and remember God loves me, but after being dumped on the garbage pile over and over by people I trusted and cared about some days it gets really hard to believe.

I still have to work on my word count for NaNoWrMo for today, but I’ll see if I get to it. I’m trying to be kind to myself today.

Today I’m grateful for:

1. The chicken I made yesterday so I had dinner for today.

2. I was able to nap for a bit this afternoon.

3. Things really suck today so tomorrow has to be a little better.

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