The writing prompt this morning was A lifetime of melancholy. I immediately wrote, “Boy does that describe me.” Then I stopped to think, what does that really mean? So to the dictionary.
Melancholy – a pensive mood.
Pensive – 1. musingly or dreamily thoughtful. 2. suggestive of sad thoughtfulness.
Thoughtful – absorbed in thought.
Yes, definitely describes me. Over the years people have told me they thought I was a snob and thought I was better than everyone else because I didn’t let them into my life. That is so far from the truth. It’s interesting how people’s perceptions can be so very distorted.
I’m so not a snob. I’m afraid of being hurt and very insecure so I don’t let people into my life very easy.
I spend a lot of time lost in my own thoughts and yes sometimes in a depressive state because I’m lonely.
The older I get the more I’m realizing that melancholy is part of my personality. It’s one of the things that make me, me.
Looking at the definitions melancholy is probably a really good trait for a writer to have. So I will work on accepting who I am and try to find joy in my lonely moments instead of resenting them.
Today I’m grateful for:
1. Who I am.
3. I have food for today.