Yesterday turned into more stress than it needed to be, but that’s the joy of the constant chronic pain of fibromyalgia, insomnia caused by the pain, and menopause all colliding. Life has become one big overwhelming, emotional roller coaster and when things interrupt the normal daily routine it feels like my whole universe is spinning wildly and going to crash and burn.
When I looked out the door yesterday and saw my skirting ripped out of the track and the track all mangled from the storm the night before I just wanted to cry. I spent over $600 having my skirting repaired after the hurricane not even a year ago and since the water main break a couple of weeks ago it’s just been apart. And then the wind came in and did that.
Sometimes I feel like being a single woman, no one hears me when I talk. Like my thoughts and feelings and words just don’t even matter or count for anything. When my neighbor complained about the sludgy muck from the water main leak, plans were changed in a moment and the clean fill that was supposed to be put in the hole outside my back door ended up being the sludgy muck. I’m so upset and disappointed about that I can’t even tell you. Needless to say, when I saw my skirting hanging like that I called the office and left a message and then trotted myself up there because it needed to be dealt with immediately.
I know I overreacted but sometimes I feel like that’s the only way anyone will listen to me anymore. Thankfully by the time I came home it looked like this. Not perfect but better for now. I will have to keep on this or I will be forgotten, I know that. Sometimes being too nice can be a disadvantage. I know it has been for me in every area of my life. I hate to have to be nasty but it seems that’s the only time anyone ever hears me.
Today I’m grateful for:
1. My skirting is fixed temporarily.
2. The plumber will be here next Friday to deal with the outside faucet.
3. I read my critique partner’s first story last night and I loved it, even though it’s not my genre that I like to read normally. I think this is going to be very exciting.