During my writing prompt this morning I wrote this sentence that just jumped off the page at me even as I was writing it.
I still love how this pen feels flying across the page, leaving behind a trail of words to follow me into the past.
Even though I am thoroughly enjoying typing this blog everyday there’s something about writing on paper with a pen that makes me happy. The way the pen slides across the page (has to be a profile pen by papermate!). The indentation left on the notebook paper after I’m done writing. (I buy the notebooks for .15 cents a piece when they have the back to school sales.) I go through a lot of notebooks in a year. I like the sound of the pages after they’ve been written on. They sound crinkly.
I like the melancholy days when I go back to my box of notebooks and see where I was a year ago. Seeing the trail of words that follow me into the past, that have brought me to my future. Maybe I can see mistakes more clearly and fix them so I don’t make the same ones again.
Paging through my past to better understand how I got to where I am today is priceless. I wouldn’t trade these days I’ve committed to writing everyday for anything. They’re making me better. Healing me of hurts that I buried deep. Slowly opening my eyes to realities in my life so I’m not shell-shocked all at once. Like a butterfly slowly emerging from its cocoon of solitary confinement. I too am seeing a tiny light at the other end of this deep dark tunnel I’ve been traveling for the past three years. I’m looking forward to looking back on my pages I’ve written a year from now and see where I’m at and where I’ve been.
Today I’m thankful for:
1. We didn’t get as much rain or severe weather as some places. Although this morning at 3:00 am there was a river in front of my house, but no damage to my home. Thank you Lord.
2. I got a few groceries yesterday to get me by for a couple of days. I don’t have enough money to get everything I need, but I’m trusting God to bring me the money I need.
3. I filled my car with gas so I can get where I need to go.