Yesterday was a rough day physically and emotionally. I know my lack of sleep didn’t help.
At one point I looked in the mirror and I said out loud, “You look like a shell of yourself. Who are you?”
Nothing in my life is how it was. The changes have been unwelcomed for the most part. Health deteriorating. Friendships changing or disappearing completely. The only welcomed change has been my writing and the writer’s group. Maybe my whole life is just shifting in a different direction. Maybe all this uncertainty is just temporary until the shift if complete.
I don’t know, but I sure do wish my life would turn around for the better. And SOON!!! I’m getting more tired and weary as each day passes. The smiles harder to paste on and fake each day.
More and more time I spend alone, isolated in my home away from the outside world. Lonely but aware that I don’t have the money or the energy to keep up with the outside world.
Today I’m grateful for:
1. I don’t have to be anywhere today.
2. I have food to eat for today.
3. I can nap shortly.