So Overwhelmed

I’ve been feeling so horrible I haven’t been paying attention to my finances much. Not that I’ve been buying anything frivolous, unless you consider food, gas, electric, and toilet paper frivolous.

I can’t make my whole mortgage payment. I’m $80 short on that. I have no money for gas, cat food, the oil change my car is severely overdue for, fruit, paper products, cleaning products, and just about anything else you can think of. I haven’t had my hair cut since December and it’s getting all wild-looking and that makes me feel horrible. I just don’t know what to do.

I don’t mean to whine, but I’m tired. Tired of feeling so overwhelmed and hopeless. I just can’t make ends meet anymore.

So move to a cheaper place you say? Well if I could get into senior housing then I’d probably have all kinds of health issues because I wouldn’t be able to control all the chemicals that people use. I’m allergic to so many things, perfumes and scents included it could be a nightmare. Plus my home will be paid off in three years then it will just be the cost of the lot rent and the regular bills.

Plus add to the fact that I am in no physical shape to try to move and I have no one to help me. And my house is a cluttered disaster from fourteen years of not feeling well enough to keep up with everything.

It truly sucks being alone with no one to help you. Those of you who have significant others need to be thankful for them and show them how very much you appreciate them.

I never anticipated my life looking this way. I worked hard and made sure that I was responsible. Then illness hit and my life has been a nightmare ever since.

I’m sitting here wondering what I could possibly sell that would give me the money I need. I’ve sold all my jewelry already and most of my dad’s coin collection. The only things I have left are the silver dollars my dad gave me. I think I have two or three of them. I hate to sell them. It just breaks my heart every time I have to sell something that’s so sentimental to me. Maybe I’ll just stick my head in the sand for today. It’s enough to deal with the pain in my shoulder this morning and the cost of the chiropractor appointment today.

Today I’m grateful for: (digging real deep today)

1. I have food for today.

2. The book I borrowed from the library is really good and it carries me away from my life for a few minutes while I’m reading. Thank you Elizabeth Berg.

3. I can nap later.



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2 responses to “So Overwhelmed

  1. I don’t know how to help, so all I can do is (((hug))). I’m grateful every day for my significant other and my folks. If it weren’t for them, I wouldn’t have a car (my lifeline), carpets or kitchen appliances. I’m also grateful for living in the UK where the benefits system helps out, and I get free treatment on the NHS. I really hope you find a way out of your financial woes. x

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