I think this new anti-depressant might be the answer I’ve been searching for. I’ve only taken one so far and I’m not feeling as agitated. I couldn’t get anything done before between the pain, fatigue, and agitation.
Yesterday I actually FELT like cleaning. I vacuumed, mopped, cleaned the bathroom, and then passed out on the couch in severe pain.
I didn’t get agitated so I think the pill is working. I think I may need to take one every third or fourth day. I took one Tuesday afternoon and I’m noticing I’m a little agitated right now. I’m trying to print business cards for the writer’s conference at the end of the month and the printer is not cooperating and I am getting really AGITATED. (Beyond what I think is normal.) My hormones must be jumping around again. So this afternoon after lunch I’ll take another pill.
There are so many things I need to do and want to do but my energy level is so very limited. I want to de-clutter my home in the worst way, but other things get in the way, like grocery shopping, taking care of the car, me, the cat and just trying to keep up with basic cleaning like vacuuming, mopping, dishes, and keeping the bathroom clean. Friends have offered to help, but I really need to go through my stuff on my own. I did have some help a couple of months ago and I appreciated it, but since I didn’t put the stuff away myself I don’t know where certain things are and that is causing agitation too.
For today I think I need to keep it light. I need to pay my lot rent and maybe I can de-clutter my kitchen counter. That’s where all my mail and odds and ends seem to end up and I really need to just deal with things as they come in the door, but once again my pain and fatigue win every time.
I think I just need to accept myself where I’m at today. (FAR FROM PERFECT). And just do what I need to do to take care of me and Morriss the best I can within the limits of my disease and hope for better days to come.
Today I’m thankful for:
1. I printed 40 business cards for the writers conference and they look great.
2. I have a nice clean bathroom to take a shower in this morning.
3. I have medication to help me through this menopause hell. (hopefully this will be the answer)